Monday, January 14, 2013

Life Has Pull-Backs


In the world of photography there is a term called "a pull-back".  Rather obvious term that references a tracking shot or zoom shot that moves back from the subject and the photographers angle to reveal the whole context of the scene.  As a photographer myself, I am ALWAYS interested in seeing the pull-back shot so I can get a better understanding of the lighting, the space needed, the set-up that created the end result photo that I admire. 

I also like pull backs because it is nice to see that I am not the only one that uses unexpected spaces to get a shot... like a front entry way, a garage, the bathroom (yes, the bathroom, it has good lighting!!) etc. 

Pull-backs also provide me a glimpse of another photographers real space, real life, real method. 

Let me explain.  As a photographer I do spend a portion of my time looking at other photographers work as a form of mentorship and inspiration.  But what tends to happen is that over time I start to feel inadequate, like I don't have the right gear, the right space, the right ideas, the right stuff to be a photographer.  When that happens, it is no bueno.  Not for me, for my husband or for my clients.  If I lose faith in what I do have then I am not going to produce good work.  Photography is art and producing art has no right or wrong, it is about passion and joy... at least for me.

What I also know is that the desire for mentorship and inspiration is needed for life.. in general.  There is an urge for us to see other ways people style their clothing, their hair, their laundry rooms, their remotes, the way they parent their children, love their spouse, etc.  People are interested, naturally, in seeing how others LIVE. 

The information found in Instagram, Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, Blogs, Magazines, Books... all of it is showing us what others are doing, thinking, living, being... and after a couple hours, days, weeks, months of seeing how other people do what they do... the thought might creep in... "I'm not doing IT right. I'm not good enough."

Hell, not only do I sometimes think this, but I provide the material for others to feel the same way.  I post pictures of my beautiful kids hugging in a recliner on a Sunday morning.  I post images of a clean house with everything in its place.  I post status updates of my husband and I supporting one another completely, I share date nights online that include what theater we are at and what our meal tasted like.  I provide snapshots of my so-called perfection.

But to go full circle.  I remind you... every image, has a pull back.  Every life moment has a pull-back.  And sometimes, a lot of the time, it is nothing close to perfect! 

What I don't post is that sometimes I threaten to not feed my kids unless they smile at the camera, that my husband and I have had pretty heated arguments/fights that resulted in one of us sleeping on the couch, dates nights are far and few between unless cooking mac and cheese for the kids in the kitchen together counts as a date, the images of a perfectly clean house is only showing THREE of FOUR walls because that fourth wall is filled with a cluttered, chaotic, mess of papers, boxes and shoes strewn across the desk.  My pull-backs are pretty messy.  My pull backs are where the real is.

Even the pull-back on my relationship would reveal that while my husband and I love each other intensely and forever... it isn't easy.  Our love has never heard the word easy.  It takes work. Hard work. Sometimes the passion gets a little weak and you have to rely on the promise to see you through.. until the passion is reinvented.  The goal is to always reinvent the passion. Much and Often.

So what I am getting at is this.... if you, like me, ever get stuck feeling a little down because your hellions are running around with underwear on their head waving flyswatters as swords while your friends children are sitting perfectly straight at the table, eating broccoli, and singing love songs to their parents... trust me... there is a pull-back.  There is always a pull-back.

Not many people like to show the real parts of their life cause it isn't likely to get re-pinned or a thumbs up.  And we all have a need to be liked and accepted.  It is a basic need for all humans.  No fault, just a reality. 

But now you know when you see pretty pictures of my house on Instagram or Facebook, it will only be three of four walls, and only right after I cleaned up one hell of a mess.  Which only happens twice a month. 

Remember... there are ALWAYS pull-backs to that beautiful life and this life is not about what is right, but about the passion and joy in what is.  Life is exactly that - imperfectly beautiful.

Now I gotta go.  It's time to threaten the kids so I can get some good Valentines photos of them... in the bathroom so I can make ridiculously lame school favors that I will post on Pinterest so I look like a perfect mom, which I am not -- at all.  :)

Three of my four walls:

1 comment:

Dear Gina said...

Oh Mercy I'm not alone!
How refreshing to see it actually put into words:) Good words at that!
I think its a struggle within we women about being " good enough". Another club to belong to eh?
Great post!